I have my mid term review today with my boss & the big boss. I am going to be asked questions like – What are your long term objectives? How long do you wish to be in this country? What are your career aspirations – which country from here , which division , which role etc ? Where do you see yourself after 2, 5 and 10 years?
And the problem is that I don’t know. Yes I dont. And I am ok with that.
I never claimed to be career oriented, or ambitious. And I have reached here by natural progression – without proactively doing anything about it. I am good at what I do. But that’s about it! I work because I cant sit idle. I don’t see the motivation to go places in my career. Heading a unit doesn’t motivate me. Maybe I am weird. Or maybe just that I am in the wrong profession. I don’t know.
I like being honest. But I am aware of the fact that if someone mentioned this in their review, probably the management would think of that person as someone lacking drive hence label that person as a non performer. I don’t want them to think like that. For the simple reason that its not true. I am at the same place in this point in time as many of my other peers who were proactive all along in their efforts to reach this position. So like I said my performance has ensured my natural progression. And I am content to be in this place at this without having a future plan. Not because this place in my career is the end that i had envisioned, but for the simple reason that i am a person who doesn't need too much to feel content. I do not rely on having an ambition (career wise) to feel happy & alive.
Maybe I am in that phase of my life where something else is of a higher importance to me than career (Although I doubt if career would ever become my top priority …but that remains to be seen!). And that something else is - ensuring companionship for myself. Yes companionship..more so, for my old age. As of right now I don’t have any complaints about being single. I don’t mind being single, infact enjoy the me-time.
Coming back to my review… what is the best way I can get these guys to figure out that my not gunning for any bigger role or country of strategic importance doesn’t automatically imply that I have lost all interest in my work? That my being content in this place & not having a 10 year plan doesn't mean that I am anti-progression & surprisingly when the progress is for my OWN self. Now being the management, they should be equipped to see things clearly. BUT do they really have the time, more importantly, the willingness to play psychoanalyst for just another employee, revenue generating alright, but just another employee. I don’t think so.
Anyway …enough of whining. Let me go to that damn meeting now. After all I have to negotiate my increment in this meeting. I like the idea of more money.
And No, I don’t wear glasses for my myopia.